I cannot believe how off-track my life can get in a matter of a couple of weeks. Firstly, all our financial security is currently up in the air...way up in the air. It has been over 2 weeks, and Jay has had 1 interview with Xerox. I cannot believe that he is laying back, planning on living on our savings. He was the one who wanted this house, and to do all the work that this house needs. Now we can barely pay the bills and make the mortgage with just me working (we can't actually, that's why our savings are being drained) and we damn sure can't afford to pay for all the supplies we need to finish the landscaping and redoing the basement, kitchen, and bath. Also, if you're not going to be working for money, you can at least be working on the house. NOT playing football outside and shopping. WTF!? I'm just feeling very angry and actually a bit betrayed by his seeming indifference. I know that I am the one who worries, but he won't even talk to me about what is going on. It's supremely frustrating to me.

And of course, this is the MPM week at the MBL. I did my poster yesterday and it seemed to go well. No poster awards in it for me, I suppose, but it is over. Now if I could just get my ass out of bed in the mornings. I need to do several things.
1. To improve my productivity at the lab, I need to follow my original lab schedule and arrive no later than 9 am. To do this I need to be in bed no later than 11:30, preferably 10:30. I will also be getting up at 7 am even on the weekends to keep my habit fresh.
2. No more web surfing until after 4:30 at work. Checking email is fine, but no lj or shopping.
3. Back to reading my papers, at least 2 everyday.

I think that those three things will help to keep me on track. I am so close to graduating, I need to make sure that I stay focused and don't lose sight of finishing up my degree in May. I also need to start thinking very seriously about what I want to do and where I want to go for my post-doc. I will make a list this week of people I would like to work with, and then I will narrow that down by developing project ideas for each lab. I may post this in my lj, as this is my rl journal and where I go to get my thoughts out of my head. I really helps me to focus on my emotions and figure out what I am really feeling.